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The Top 10 Things Firefighters Say To The Owner of a House on Fire

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10) "You been playing with matches again?"

9) "Sorry we're late but we couldn't find that damn Dalmation."

8) "Hot enough for ya?"

7) "If you want, we can help this spread to your neighbor's house."

6) "Did you Stop,Drop and Roll?...If not, you better get your ass back in there and do it right!"

5) "That blaze would make one hell of a marshmallow roast."

4) "Based on this sir, I'd say your son is DEFINITELY a pyromaniac."

3) "The religious right just called...can they use what's left of your house for a bookburning?"

2) "I know its not much compared to losing everything but I'll let you ring the siren once before we leave."

1) "What was that catchy Talkin' Heads song.."Burnin' Down the...Oh,sorry."

Thanks to Karen and Mike for the Topic and BPATT for the list

Submitted: Fri Sep 11 20:03:14 1998
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