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The Top 10 Things That Defendants Tell A Judge Just Before Sentencing

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10) "I'm so full of remorse that I'm gonna hurl."

9) "That little bit about wanting to kill every member of the jury, their families, their pets and you...I was just kidding!"

8) "I voted for you last time..doesn't that count for something?"

7) "Wapner has NOTHING on you."

6) "I've got some BUDLIGHT for a LIGHT sentence if you know what I mean."

5) "Could I be sent to a Heterosexual section of the prison, please?"

4) "Judge Judy would just give me a warning."

3) "Consecutive sentences are nothing more than run-on sentences which aint' correct grammatically and thus not legal either."

2) "My attorney sucks...is it too late to ask for another one?"

1) "Jury of my peers, my ass!!! I don't know any of these folks."

Thanks to Karen and Mike for the Topic and BPATT for the list

Submitted: Fri Sep 11 19:12:13 1998
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