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The Top 10 Reasons Not To Stay in West Virginia


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Writer's note: I've never been to West Virginia but I have been to/lived in several small towns before(See Top 10 Things to do on a Small Town Saturday Night) and I think it compares.

10) Contrary to what the damn song says, Country Roads do NOT always take you home.

9) You dream of a life that will involve a paved road.

8) You grow tired of tourists stopping by, asking for directions to the state of "South Virginia", and driving off in a fit of laughter.

7) You're stuck with AM Radio...AM COUNTRY radio.

6) You've grown tired of seeing the group "Glass Tiger" at the local Acorn Festival each year.

5) The sheep won't take your "abuse" anymore and they are planning a revolt.

4) Hayrides are still limited to just 10 mph.

3) The local theatre's performance of "Les Miserables" left something, no A LOT, to be desired.

2) You've had it with those pesky revenuers destroying your stills of "shine".

1) No matter how hard you try, your cows don't appear receptive to chasing or catching that Frisbee.

Thanks to Joelle for the Topic and BPATT for the list

Submitted: Mon Apr 6 16:37:29 1998

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