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10) Door to Front desk has a slot in it that is slid open to verify membership.

9) I'm not a health expert but having that McDonald's stand in between the Aerobics area and the free weights doesn't seem right.

8) The Towel guy holds back giving you a towel so he can "check you out."

7) There's a security guard for the sauna.

6) You have to salute your "professional trainer".

5) Personal trainer is convinced that carrying his groceries up 30 flights of stairs is much better than some lame stairmaster.

4) The Aerobics program consists of nothing but Videos.

3) Having to plow the field out back seems more suited for oxen than an actual exercise.

2) That carpet in the locker room?...that's really bad shower mold!